The Hangover Leftover Party

I have another resolution. I'm going to really learn how to play chess. I already know how to play, but I don't have any idea of the shape of the game. Jay played with me once, beat me in like ten minutes, then decided I wasn't a worthy partner and never played me again. This was one of the many small chivalric kindnesses Ayhan afforded me. We played chess (sort of, I found out) every day--and Ayhan would let it drag on as long as he could and then beat me, or, as I realized, let me win.
There was some overlap between the two relationships and I had already played chess with Jay when this hit me--Ayhan let me win.
"You've been letting me win." I told him
"How did you realize that?" he asked. And it was over.
Hmmm.....letting me win at chess/giving me a venereal disease....didn't make up for it. Some small part of me whispers that it is coarse to judge him for that, that he didn't mean to and really thought he wasn't contagious, and that he was kind and decent and held all the doors and helped clean up after the parties and was nice to my mother, and the only price I had to pay was this silly little skin condition--but then I think--no. It's really not okay at all. You have to be honest about what's dangerous about yourself to another person. It's disregarding them in the worst way.
So I'm really going to learn chess this year.
Yesterday was the hangover leftover party. So many people showed up! I couldn't believe it. I ran out of wine. I was absolutely not expecting that many people. It's like that--some years there's nobody--someyears--everybody. I made a big kettle of hoppin john, and just let it roll. I didn't enjoy it very much, though, because a lot of people showed up I didn't know very well, so I felt I had to babysit them, which I did, but that's always a bit of a pain. It wasn't relaxing...which is kind of the whole point of the party. And what a crowd--lots of conservative people--mostly the parents of Lilly's friends. I guess they wanted to check me out, since Lilly has sort of evolved into the official social coordinator of her school and everybody's usually over at my house. My neighbors came over and my old bandmate, Rashid, bringing his guitar. Rashid sort of freaked everybody out, I think, with his swarthy good looks and intense gaze and black leather and galoises, but oh well. Then he turned off the stereo and started playing music, which I don't think happens much at the parties these people usually go to. Then Dave, my drummer,brought his djimba in and my neighbor, bless her heart, ran to her house and brought over all these wonderful musical instruments collected on her travels and we distributed them to all the guests. it was really cute. Two of the most straightlaced parents fell in love with a little xylophone and sat on the couch playing it together. I got out my fiddle and for about 1/2 hour, everybody just played and played. Rashid wanted to keep going, but Jay came up to me and whispered in my ear:
"I know another joke. Want to hear it?"'
"Sure."
"Okay. What's more boring than a hippie drumming circle?"
"Nothing?"
"Yep."
So I gently discouraged him. Actually, what happened was, he went outside in the freezing cold to suck down another Galois, and I put the stereo back on.
I think there was just enough of that.
Then someone showed up with a baked alaska--a baked alaska!!
Hali called right at the start of the party to tell me that she and Juan wouldn't be able to make it.
"But I want to tell you how truly grateful I am for your invitation." she says.
One big happy family.
The kids had their own party downstairs. For some reason it's freezing down there. They watched movies and played charades and ate cookies. I made random unpredictable surveillance sweeps, which I find to be the best deterrent to illicit undesirable teenage activity. How to keep your kid out of trouble? Don't hound them, question them, harass them. Just frequently, magically, and unpredictably.....materialize.
Poof!
Happy New Year.
that's my 1/2 hour.